I have my first ever photoshoot on Tuesday.
What the sweet hell am I going to wear?
It's for the cover of North East magazine, a deliciously glossy London magazine for all the delightful people who live in Primrose Hill (where my soon-to-launch novel, A GIRL LIKE YOU, is set), Hampstead, Belsize Park, and so on.
Like most people, I'm pretty uncomfortable in front of the camera - unless, of course, I am three wheets to the shind, in which case I will either offer a Cheshire cat smile or break out my Paris Hilton pose (the perfect combination of flattering and ridiculous). My Twitter pic is from a wedding in the States last year, it was a Paris pose gone slightly wrong, so I just look tipsy and conniving. Anyway. I can't do much about my face. The delightful ladies at Lost In Beauty have earmarked two hours to improve it (I'm rather excited to see what they might do to my eyebrows, but that's a different post altogether) so that should get things in good shape.
The point is I don't know what to wear.
And you know how I feel about clothes (hint: I like them). I emailed the lovely editor, Tash, and she said 'not black' which wipes out half my wardrobe. Apart from black, I only have a lot of grey, white, a tiny bit of navy and red, and one neon yellow skinny belt that, surprisingly, gets a lot of play. In other words, I have nothing to wear. And three days to find something.
Holly asked if I would do a book signing for A GIRL LIKE YOU. I haven't planned one yet, as one time I saw an author sitting at a desk in a bookshop, with a stack of books ready to be signed, and no one was talking to him and he looked like he wanted to cry. (I bought one and it was about sport, of all things.) The idea of being that author makes me shudder internally. Maybe I'm wrong, what do you think?
I don't know about a launch party, either - I had one for THE DATING DETOX but it was really just a party for my friends where there happened to be a stack of books in the corner. Hmm.